If your car takes unleaded gas, would you put diesel fuel in it? Of course not. The same goes for loving your mate. Your love language and that of your spouse can be as different as speaking Chinese from English. Learning to speak your mate’s love language can make you a superstar in his or her eyes.
The Five Languages by Gary Chapman is one of my all-time favorite books on relationships. Knowing your love language can be helpful not only for your spouse, but for your friends and family. So singles, read up too. Below are ways you can show your loved one you love them in their own language. Have fun!
Don’t know your love language? Take the quiz here.
25 Ways to Fill Your Loved One’s Love Tank
Words of Affirmation
- Write him a love letter. Be sure to give a card with a personalized note on every special occasion. Your words will be priceless.
- Put a note in her pocket for her to discover later thanking her specifically for something she’s done for you in the last week.
- Say “thank you” and “I’m proud of you” often, and be sure to tell him what for.
- Leave a voice mail giving an encouraging word about one of their talents.
- Compliment him in front of his parents or friends. Better yet, compliment him to his friends behind his back. Word will get back to him, and he will beam.
- Is his favorite past time fishing and you hate it? Take a deep breath, go with him, and smile knowing that you are giving him a good time. If it’s hunting, go with him. If it’s basketball, go to a game with him.
- Meet for lunch.
- Block off 30 minutes a day for uninterrupted conversation.
- Take a vacation together.
- Go for a walk together.
- Never forget a birthday or anniversary. Ask her friends and family for gift ideas.
- Pick or send her flowers. It doesn’t have to be expensive. It’s that fact that you thought of her.
- Give a handmade gift. You may have to enroll in a painting or ceramic class to create something, or give a photo collage.
- Give a parade of gifts for a day: Leave him a piece of candy in his briefcase, bring him his favorite flavored coffee at work, leave a note in lunch bag.
- Give her a small token to remember each place you visit. Be sure to purchase or find it without your spouse. This could be a small stone from your last camping trip to a Christmas ornament from your last vacation spot.
Acts of Service
- Wash her car, fill her tank up with gas literally.
- Make the bed everyday, or do the dishes, or any household chore that she hates.
- Plant her a flower bed or vegetable garden.
- Have dinner ready for him when he gets home.
- Babysit the kids for an afternoon to give her a day off to herself.
- Hold hands while doing every day things like watching TV or walking to the car.
- When you pass by him in the house, gently touch his shoulder or back. Or even better, give him a hug and tell him how much you appreciate him.
- Give him a back scratch or run your fingers through her hair.
- Initiate lovemaking.
- Give her a back rub.
Question: Got any tips that made you the queen or King of the world? Share your creative ways to communicate your love.
Related posts: Required Reading For Engaged Couples, Marriage Wisdom
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